Ryan Gosling is Your Favorite Superhero

Apr 17

Ryan Gosling as Lex Luthor

"Hey girl, I know I’m Lex Luthor, but I really respect that you don’t have any preconceived anger about that."

Ryan Gosling as Reed Richards

"Hey girl, they might call me Mr. Fantastic, but all I want to do is stretch my arms around you."

Ryan Gosling as Thor

"Hey girl, I’m just a god, with a hammer, and a heart."

Ryan Gosling as Superman

"Hey girl, when I’m around you, Kryptonite is my second-biggest weakness."

(Also: Ryan Gosling in Clark Kent glasses, amirite?)

Ryan Gosling as Green Lantern

So maybe the version with the other Ryan wasn’t the best…we’d be ok with a reboot right away.

"Hey girl, I’m yours in brightest day and blackest night."

Ryan Gosling as Spider-Man

"Hey girl, I know we’ve already rebooted this franchise pretty recently, but my Spidey-sense told me I had to meet you."

Tobey, who? Andrew, what? We’d take another reboot of the Spider-Man franchise if Mr. Gosling were on board.

Ryan Gosling as The Flash

"Hey girl, I’m the fastest man alive, but I think we should take this relationship at a pace you’re comfortable with."

Gosling as Barry Allen? That’s a pretty speedy way into our hearts.

Ryan Gosling as The Incredible Hulk

Hulk might not be the best at communication, and maybe he has some anger issues, but Bruce Banner is a sweetie, and those big green arms would be great for cuddling.

"Hey girl, you wouldn’t like me when I’m angry, but I think you’re beautiful when you are."

Ryan Gosling as Aquaman

"Hey girl, I can talk to dolphins. That squeaking sound is them saying, ‘you’re beautiful.’"

To be fair, the Aquaman that Geoff Johns is writing right now is slightly less of an “I talk to dolphins” Aquaman, and more of a real superhero. Maybe we’ll have to reboot this one.

Ryan Gosling as Batman

"Hey girl, I’M BATMAN."

(or for fans of the Miller run, “Hey girl, I’M THE GODDAMN BATMAN.”)